The Television Chronicles Part 2.....Plus

I solved the television dilemma. I took the second new TV back and bought an old TV off Craig's List. Wooohooo! $125 for a Sony Trinitron HDTV (with stand and Sony receiver and VHS [what's that?] and a DVD player) that isn't quite so blurry as the other two new expensive TVs. Now, you should know that my son wept upon hearing this decision. "You mean we're going to have a FAT TV?" the young man said and I laughed wickedly and shouted YES, YES A FAT TV. HAHAHA! and he got teary and said, "How big is it?" and I replied, ONLY 30 INCHES!!!! HAHAHA! and he punched his frustration into the couch and shed a tear realizing that he was NOT going to have a thin, large TV with a sharp picture and TIVO. Now, don't get me wrong, I am not the mom who wants to be playing board games and twenty questions instead of watching American Idol. I am just trying to get through my Direct TV contract as unscathed as possible and that means until September 11, 2011 I cannot do anything that extends my contract.....such as getting an HD box or even TALKING with a Direct TV representative. Every 15 minutes on the phone with a rep from that place adds two years onto your contract. Not really but almost.

Halloween was a little bittersweet this year (yes, I'm writing about Halloween). Every year for 5 or 6 years, the moms walked the kids around the neighborhood. The moms would sip warm Tom and Jerry's (recipe follows) and the kids would run around collecting candy. We have a big neighborhood so it was a couple hour ordeal. But it was fun and there was lots of laughing and waving and hellos. We saw neighbors we hadn't seen in a while and saw scary werewolves and dainty princesses. And our kids were young and carefree and excited. And innocent. This year some of the kids were over Halloween - teenagers! - and some were out of town and it wasn't the same. BUT, mostly it made me aware of life moving on and that the parties and holidays and night times for Jay were changing. It just made me really miss those other times and it made me realize they're over. Not coming back. No more little kid, but soon to be teenager. And moms don't follow their 14 year olds around in a pack like that. Hahaha.

Of course my one consolation is that some people never grow up. Here's B and I, Hairy Potter and Tippy Hedren. Classic movie night. I guess Halloween never dies, the parties just change. I kept running my sewn-on birds into everyone.

Tom and Jerry Recipe.....
Ingredients
3 egg whites
3 egg yolks
3 Tablespoons powdered sugar
1/2 teaspoon ground allspice
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon ground cloves
1/2 jigger lukewarm brandy
1 jigger lukewarm rum
hot water, milk or coffee
grated nutmeg
Beat egg whites til stiff froth. Separately beat egg yolks until light in color and then gradually beat in sugar, allspice, cinnamon and cloves. Fold yolk mixture into whites and pour 2 tablespoons of this mixture into each of four 8-ounce mugs. Add 1/2 jigger brandy and 1 jigger dark rum to each mug. Fill mugs with very hot water, milk, or coffee. Stir well and sprinkle the top with grated nutmeg.

After making fun of my son earlier for his TV love, I'll have to brag about him now for his thank you notes. Okay, ONE thank you note.
This is not status quo for him, but I intend to use this as a prototype for Christmas this year. Normally, he writes a simple (sparse) thanks for the gift kind of note, as in Thanks For The Gift is all he writes. This time he elaborated and was surprisingly articulate. It made me proud. If you click on the picture you can read it.

And then, a weird thing....back when I was playing Scrabble, a friend and I were about to finish our game. There were no tiles left and it was my turn. I looked at the tiles and it dawned on me...they were a mixed up spelling of POET! Freak my shit out. It was so cool I had to take a picture of it. And then I had to tell most people I spoke to that entire week. Obviously the weird thing here is not that those four letters could spell poet....the weird thing was my reaction to it. Hahahaha.

This has been a wonderful weekend. We all went to see Unstoppable, which was an okay movie. I bought the 2011 Harkins movie cup so I can get dollar cokes (although I usually have them fill it with water which mostly defeats the purpose) and I'm looking forward to movies galore. I had a great Thanksgiving with a couple days in Phoenix (Coyote game and zoo) and then back to Flagstaff for Thanksgiving dinner and pie. Then pie for breakfast, pie for lunch, and even pie for dinner since. I have a great family, great friends and a great life. I miss my folks but I also know they raised me well and happy. I am surrounded by little wonders every day. And I see them. My son, my B, my running water and my food in my fridge (and by food I mean pie). And then 647 other things and people and memories that keep me going. And I am just so thankful for all of it.

"Reflect upon your present blessings, of which every man
has many, not on your past misfortunes, of which all men
have some. "
--Charles Dickens (1812-1870) English novelist

"To be alive, to be able to see, to walk...it's all a miracle. I have
adopted the technique of living life from miracle to miracle."
--Arthur Rubinstein

The Television Chronicles

This story is meant to be a metaphor about something. A message, in a sense, about the world, in a way that I haven't yet deciphered. Truth be told, I'd like to be profound, and I think there's a bigger picture here (no pun intended) but I really think it might also just be a slice-o-life anecdote. Enough preface.......

I bought a TV from Sam's Club a couple years ago. Vizio, 37" HDMI flatscreen. $749 smackers. Nice TV. I never did get HDMI. Too expensive, plus the fact that there are just a few HD channels out there. I DID, however, get the three year service plan. I have NEVER done anything like that before. So, about three months ago, the TV goes out. I remember the service plan. I believe I may have danced around the kitchen at that point, hollering Waaaahooooo. Maybe not. I called the service company and they sent me a big-ass box, I sent the TV off to Minnesota, and I waited. After almost two months, I called 'em up. Hey, where's my TV? My TV was not fixable so I got a check to go get another.

B and I read every possible thing about televisions on the Internet. I now know about 1080i, 120 hz, and LED vs LCD. We found another Vizio at Walmart; LED, HDMI, 1080, 120, and bigger (42") on sale, two year additional service plan, bought it, got it home, set it up and it SUCKED. I'm still too cheap to pay the huge amount for the HD box AND HD service (somewhere in this blog is a post about my absolute disdain (hatred) for Direct TV) and two more years added on to my contract. Come to find out, HDTV without the HD service is crapola.

Took that TV back and got the exact TV I had before, smaller, LCD, 60 hz, thinking this would be better. Not really.

So here's my disjointed commentary.....why don't they just make standard televisions anymore? The HD technology seems to be out of wack. There are only a few HD channels. Standard channels are blurry and pixilated on HD tvs. The whole thing is a great big mess. Okay, I don't even watch much TV, but really, when I am watching the Cardinals play, I just want a clear picture. There is just something crazy about the world having come up with the technology for amazingly clear vivid television, and then not making TV's that work with that technology.

Whew. Anyhow, now we have a TV in the living room that still has plastic on the sides (to my son's chagrin) as I am waiting to see what happens during the pre-Christmas sales.

Switching the subject, I have to say I wonder sometimes about what the animals do when we're gone during the day. Today I found out.....

My artist's Life

I found this on Facebook.....oh, wait, first, before you read my fabulous artist's statement, make your own!!

Get your own artist's statement here


Jill's Artist Statement


"Through my work I attempt to examine the phenomenon of Wiley Coyote as a methaphorical interpretation of both Salvador Dali and fishing.

What began as a personal journey of shitism has translated into images of Huevos Rancheros and toes that resonate with caucasian people to question their own yellowness.

My mixed media twigs embody an idiosyncratic view of The Dali Lama, yet the familiar imagery allows for a connection between Milton Berle, marigolds and eggs.

My work is in the private collection of Ed Asner who said 'Holy Crimenetly!, that's some real itty bitty Art.'

I am a recipient of a grant from Folsom Prison where I served time for stealing mugs and tie clips from the gift shop of The Museum of Tolerance. I have exhibited in group shows at Freddy's Steakburger and The Metropolitan , though not at the same time. I currently spend my time between my hallway and Berlin."

Hahahaha! That is probably very right on.

Robot Games

So here's the deal with Scrabble and me.

I loved Scrabble. Scrabble meant sitting at the table with a glass of wine and a dozen chocolate chips in a small shallow bowl. Little wooden tiles on a little wooden rack. Keeping score on the back of a used envelope to save paper. Writing my seven point scores (B kicks my butt most of the time) with my favorite pen, a Pilot Razor, gray with a little yellow top and the smallest, yet smoothest felt tip nib. Ahhhh, THAT was Scrabble. Then I found Facebook Scrabble. I could play many games at once, one play a day, anytime I wanted. It was fun and I became addicted. It was pretty wild though, and people were fucking smarter than I thought they were. The other players were throwing down crazy words, as in, these people were using Q with no u after it. Come ON people, there is always a u after a Q. Words like qoph and ose and faucal and mikron. Hahahaha. Those aren't words! But yes, yes they are as far as Scrabble Facebook is concerned. Well, come to find out, there are sites on the internet that are Scrabble cheat sites. Just type in your letters and you get all the words you can imagine....and then some. Seven letter words, six letter words, whatever you need. That's where all those fancy schmancy words were coming from (except Ann, who does NOT cheat). So, what did I do. I JOINED IN. I cheated too. I spent hours cheating. I wasted an unbelievable amount of time plugging my letters into a little box and pouring over which words I should use. Then I had my epiphany.....Scrabble had become a huge time suck where I didn't have to think or even relate to anyone else. I wasn't even using my brain. The only goal was to beat someone else's score. What in the hell was wrong with me!!!??? I could have been reading a book, or writing a book, or watching the Discovery Channel. I could have been playing real live Scrabble and using my BRAIN. Shoot, I could have been blogging. So, I'm not playing anymore (except with Ann). Facebook Scrabble anyway. If anyone wants to play Scrabble with me, you have to come over, have a glass of wine, chat and think.

Also, you still have three days to send me a cocktail napkin poem (see my last blog). Do it!

Use A Pen......

Okay, here's the deal. I will be hosting a little poetry reading at this great bar, Uptown Billiards, on Wednesday. I decided the theme would be "Cocktail Napkin Poems." This would be any poem written, or sounding like it was written, on a cocktail napkin. I'm thinking Bukowski, Hemingway, etc... poems that might be on the shorter side. BUT, I will also read poems written by YOU! Or, you can come read them yourself. So, when you're out this weekend, write a poem on a cocktail napkin and e-mail the poem to me. jilliebug@aol.com. Do it!!!! Just get the poem to me by Wednesday afternoon. Yay! Six o'clock Wednesday night. I will write a poem too...probably tonight....possibly at Uptown Billiards.

110 days of self imposed non blogging

These are the monsters. I will tell you about them. They live in that cup; the one with Bear on the front. The brownish one in the front appears to be levitating. They were found a few days ago in the shower, Jay's shower, when he noticed a big fat spider web entrenched in the larger container the cup and the monsters and a small personalized watering can were in. This solved one mystery....where in the heck did that huge spider come from that crawled up Jay's small white rib cage and made him, a twelve year old boy, jump from the shower and run screaming into the hall like a little girl (his words). So, back to the monsters. The monsters have lived in the cup for years now. They were a bath game Jay and I used to play when he was a tiny boy, appropriately called "monster toss." I would hold the cup and he would try and toss the monsters in, while I moved the cup around to CATCH the monsters. We were both working toward the same outcome - Jay winning the game.

Now the monsters are under the sink, in the cup, waiting for the day when someone might play monster toss again, or the day they will be thrown away, or the day they will be sent off to Goodwill. My desire is, of course, the future monster toss game. Do you ever just wonder, though, what in the heck's going to happen? I don't think I'll ever be destitute. I envision hanging out in this house, traveling, teaching, doing art and writing and allofthat, with my child (who, even in college should only be a text away) and my man. This is the curse and the blessing of life. I think we all want the best and we all want to be the best, but in that itty bitty recess of blank space left in the brain, we all sometimes wonder, WHERE AM I GOING? So I shut that damn hatch under the rug, down the tunnel, in that back recess of my mind and plan things like Italy and grocery shopping and writing a book, and 25 years down the line, another tiny child (Jay's, not mine) to play monster toss with. I am the perpetual looker on the bright side of.

Today is The Day of the Dead, celebrated November 1st and 2nd. I just made a chocolate cake from scratch. The recipe is written on the inside of an old envelope in my mother's hand. It's probably 50 years old. It's called "Peggy's Devils Food Cake." I do not know who Peggy is. I also have two small loaves of zucchini bread in the fridge for my dad, who died on The Day of the Dead. I wrote my parents a letter too, so they can kick back, eat cake and bread and read my letter.

So, I didn't blog for a very long time. I started one in August with this....

So, Barry says to me a week or so ago...".You should just delete your blog. You don't write anymore. Just get rid of it." Then my friend Maggie makes a little snarky comment like, "So, I guess you're not blogging anymore...." As time goes on I am the recipient of several more comments like that,,,,"Go home and BLOG" was a subtle one, as was, "I have no idea what's going on with you because YOU'RE NOT BLOGGING ANYMORE." Hahahahahaha. I caught you! I caught you all!!!! You missed me. You WERE reading even though you never had the cajones to comment. Fine. That's all I needed to know.

and then I was done. And then no one even commented anymore. I think I had (have) writer's block, although I don't believe in writer's block. I think Writer's Block is a made-up disease like Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (Hahaha, people are going to hate me now). I just couldn't write. No desire, no words, no ability. Finally I was even ejected from Tyge's Perennial Buds list, which truly verified my non-existence in the blog world.

Here I am.

All of the following 20 things are true and have happened during the last 110 days.....

1. I got a motorcycle (1968 Honda 90).
2. I got a motorcycle licence.
3. We have a new cat (Magpie).
4. Jay started middle school.
5. I only work two days a week at Starbucks now.
6. I have my Life Coach certificate.
7. I take a pottery class.
8. Flagstaff has a Freddy's Steakburger.
9. I had a swell garden.
10. I got two oil changes.
11. The patio is done.
12. I got new tires.
13. Went to Kansas.
14. I met Barry's aunt.
15. Jay got a guinea pig (Buddy).
16. I became addicted to storage unit sales
17. I vowed to not buy anything else that needs to be fixed.
18. We turned the whole garage into an art studio.
19. I plucked 17 hairs out of my chin (not at the same time).
20. I started teaching my beloved poetry class.

Bonus #21. We discovered how to watch current episodes of Dexter on the computer without forking over the dough to Showtime!