Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Graduation


Once upon a time there was a little boy. When he started to school, he wrote with his left hand. The year was sometime around 1924. Every child was taught to write with their right hand. When that little boy would write, the teacher would bang his left hand with a ruler. He naturally wrote left handed and the teacher had to hit him so often that when he got home from school his knuckles would be bloody. He learned to write right-handed. He also, from that point on, developed a horrible stutter. He grew up, stayed right-handed and kept the stutter. It was embarrassing, and under stress, debilitating. In high school, he had to take a speech class. He decided to do his big speech on Nestle Chocolate and wrote to Nestle to get information. He was armed with candy bars, pages of facts and his own writing. He was in the twelfth grade. When he got up to speak, he couldn't. He started to stutter. He couldn't say a clear word. His teacher told him to sit down. He tried again, and couldn't do it. He left class. His teacher didn't pass him. He did not graduate from high school.

That was my dad. He went on to get a job at Dillon's Grocery Store and worked for them for 42 years. He was, as he called it, a career groceryman. He was an honest, good, kind, regular guy. He was a good father, a good husband to my mom, and a good friend. He could yell really loud sometimes but he was supportive and brave and a great teacher. He was curious about everything his whole life - he never, ever stopped learning about people and the world.

For the last few years of my dad's life, my son and I would drive to Phoenix every other weekend to stay with my parents at their assisted living facility, Fountain View Village. When my mom and my son went to sleep, my dad and I would talk, or watch Jay Leno. I asked him, when he was 86, if there was anything he wished he would have done that he didn't. He said that the only regret he had was that he didn't graduate from high school. He'd always felt bad about it.

I called his high school, my brother called the Superintendent, and my dad got a letter in the mail saying Hutchinson High School wanted to give him his well-deserved, slightly late high school diploma. He cried when he got the letter. It said that they could either mail him the diploma, he could walk with the class in May, or he could come to a special school board meeting and pick it up, there in Hutchinson. At that point, my dad used a cane or a scooter, he had hip and knee problems, he had a faulty heart. But in September of 2003, we went back to Kansas, so my dad could finally go to his high school graduation. He sat in the front row at the meeting, hoisted himself up with his cane, and walked to the front of the room. He cried during the entire meeting he was so happy. He was very proud of that diploma. Here he is on that night, a high school graduate, with his grandson, little Jay. He died two months later on November 1st. I'm so glad he got his wish.

And the stuttering....well, after that year he met a guy named Harold Faldtz. They became best buddies and Harold would punch him solid in the arm every time he'd stutter. It's certainly not the way we'd cure that kind of thing today, but my dad stopped stuttering quite soon, being buddies with Harold. He was friends with Harold all his life.

If the only prayer you said in your whole life was,
'thank you,' that would suffice.
- Meister Eckhart

Monday, January 28, 2008

A Tiny Story

There's this story about my dad I want to write about but I really want the correct picture to go with it. I have the picture...it sits near my desk. But I need to scan the print onto a disk and then transfer it onto my computer. It's just a matter of going to Target or Sam's to get it copied. So, I think about writing this dad blog everyday. I grabbed the picture this morning and was on my way out the door when I thought Hey, I might as well take a few if I'm going to put them on a disk. So, then, I take an hour going through old pictures. Haha, isn't that cute...Isn't that cool...wow, I gotta get a copy of that one. Finally, I'm on my way to Target with a big envelope of pictures. I scan about 25 and realize I've been at the picture machine in Target for AN HOUR. I decide to finish the one I'm doing and copy onto a disk. Ah-oh, it doesn't scan right... so I push the button marked "previous" and all the pictures I've scanned just disappear. OF COURSE it can be fixed...the girl just needs to hit a few buttons, bring my order back up and...

No, they're gone. She said sorry, and we can give you a $3 off coupon for our photo department. Why would I want $3 off when I'm never going to use the photo department there again?! I said, Actually, I'd like a $10 gift card. She got the okay (I must have looked distraught) and I came home.

Tomorrow I'll try again. Soon, the dad blog. With picture. And I'm going to use that whole ten dollar gift card on Starbuck's coffee.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Newton Exposed

Wow. What a great trip we had. I hope you checked out the link to Newton in my last post. Here were the highlights...

Friday
All aboard the Amtrak at 6:30 am. Checked out the roomette (small but comfy), headed to the dining car for breakfast. This trip could have also been called "Eating Tour 2008". Chicken/apple sausage, omelets, croissants, hash browns. The sausage was exquisite. Friday was just a day filled with farkel, dominoes, food, magazine reading (me), and DS Lite (Jay). For lunch; veggie burger, sliced beef with mashed potatoes, Key Lime pie, cheesecake. Dinner; Cornish Hen, Talapia, mashed potatoes, more dessert. Our attendant made up the beds around 8:00 pm and we slept until 2:30.

Saturday
Pulled into Newton at 2:50 am. Got to the Best Western and slept until 8:00. Looked at nine houses for sale, went to Conrad Snider's gallery, drove to Hutchinson to see my Aunt Patty and my cousin Jodi. Explored Newton a bit, drove around, went into antique stores, checked out the neighborhoods, ate dinner at Montana Mikes. It was such a great day but I didn't really LOVE any of the houses I toured.

Sunday
I had decided Saturday that the house thing just was not going to happen this trip. I figured it was a fun time but I'd have to come back to find a good house.
There were two more to look at but from the pictures on the Internet, I wasn't expecting to LOVE either one. My realtor, Kati, was awesome through it all. She was fun and helpful and zero pressure. We met around 11:00 on Sunday at this little bungalow style house and when we walked inside, I looked around and LOVED it. Small, well kept, with dark wide original wood trim on all the doorways. A root cellar out back, a new kitchen, a cute neighborhood. Fairly new heating, AC, and roof. Underneath the carpet in the dining room...wood floors! Built in 1915. I think I'm going to get it. Didn't even go see the second house. Turned in the rental car, Jerry came in from Salina to pick us up and get us down the highway toward Topeka. Jennifer met us halfway, Jay and I changed cars and were in Topeka where my friend, Kristy, picked us up to get us to the train station by midnight. In forty-six hours I went house hunting, saw great art, picked up a great doily in the shape of a butterfly at the antique store, saw relatives and friends, and ate A LOT.

Monday
Back on the train at 1:00 am. Slept until 8:30 am and did Friday all over again. Arrived in Flagstaff at 9:30 pm.

If you have never traveled on Amtrak, DO IT! It's fun and not too expensive. You see small towns, landscape, and animals that you just wouldn't see otherwise. We saw wild horses, antelope, deer, a baby coyote, and a bizillion animal tracks in the snow. We met great people (in the dining car they seat four to a table so we always had two strangers to chat with) and were relaxed when we stepped off the train.

This last picture is of a boarded up church that we passed. It was just beautiful and haunting. Scenes like this flew by several times a day. The chance to just get on a train and see this country in a new way is such a gift. If you ever get the chance, take a train somewhere.

My grandma is buried in Inman, Kansas. There is a quote that she said ALL the time. In fact, it's on her headstone. I've always loved it...

"This is the day which the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in
it."
Psalms

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Tripping


Jay and I are heading out to Newton this weekend. Back to the land of grain elevators, fireflys (well, not this time of year) and wheat fields. I cannot wait to get on the train and go. Part of the excitement is the train, part is a trip with Jay, but a lot of it is that I'm going back to where my mom and dad lived. My whole life we've (my mom and dad and me) spent time in that part of Kansas, driving on those old brick streets, looking at the house they lived in in the forties (614 Elm Street), the first Dillon's store my dad worked at, and stopping by friends and relatives houses. I have such a desire to be there, in that place. The last few times I've been there it's been with my sister or brother, hearing about the times before I was born, stories about my dad filling the whole, huge back yard with tomato plants or my mom, the only girl in her family to go to high school, working at Kreskies Drug and her dad picking up her pay check every Friday. I heard a quote, and I cannot remember the source right now , that goes "When an old person dies, a library burns down" and it's so true. There's so much I wish I'd asked but didn't.

Sunday, January 13, 2008

Two Things That Could Save Your Life


#1 - Poetry. Not really. But it could help you like life more. See life better. Feel like other people go through the same stellar, beautiful, awkward, nasty-ass, mardigras, sublime, tragic experiences too. I think poetry helps people feel less alone. It can, in a very short span, introduce the reader to stories and feelings that are un-nameable yet familiar. Or not. I don't know for sure. But it's worth a try. Here's a picture of a random poetry stand that my friend Kate sent when she was in Oregon. What a swell idea! If you all want to write a Haiku comment, do it! Haiku - a three line poem with the first line being 5 syllables, the second line being 7 syllables, and the third line being 5 again. It's cool if there is a little twist in the last line. Jack Kerouac says this..."it has to be a simple little picture in three little lines, that tells a great big story." Here are a couple I like....

The falling flower
I saw drift back to the branch
was a butterfly
--Arakida Moritake

To write a blues song
is to regiment riots
and pluck gems from graves.
--Etheridge Knight

#2 (Which is appropriately numbered) Colonoscopy.
Getting a colonoscopy can save your life! My brother, Jerry got one at thirty-nine, had a tumor in there, had surgery, chemo, and is alive and cancer free today. Yeah! It's painless, easy, and you should do it. I'm doing mine tomorrow!! So today I'm on clear liquids all day, which is really kind of fun and challenging. I don't think about food that much but today it's ALL I can think about. I want homemade chicken nuggets with honey mustard, and a big slice of berry pie, heated up, with ice cream. I want mashed potatoes and stuffed pork chops. I want chicken, cheese and spinache tamales with rice and beans. I want a thick slice of fresh, hot bread slathered with butter. And, I want hot and sour soup and sesame chicken and beef with broccoli. YUM! Instead, I'm drinking water and ginger-ale and tonight for dinner I'll have a big bowl of chicken consomme. Then, tomorrow for lunch I'll appreciate food so much.

Friday, January 11, 2008

Chia

Yes, I know it's juvenile. But it makes me laugh.

I bought a Chia Head for Jay at Christmas and it's flawed. There's a leak at the bottom so most of the water seeps out. So, Chia guy is just growing neck hair. Eewww! And...I swear I did not do this on purpose but somehow a chia seed ended up at the edge of this guy's nose and now he has a green boog. Yuck!

Moving on....
Exciting news! Jay and I are taking the train to Newton, Kansas in a week or so. We are going have SO MUCH FUN. I love Kansas. It's where my folks were from, and there's something about all that that I need to go back there for right now. I would not move there for good (I also LOVE my town and friends and life here!) but I cannot wait to get back there for a visit.

"I finally figured out the only reason to be alive is to enjoy it."
Rita Mae Brown

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Happy Birthday Jaybug

My son turned ten yesterday and I thought I'd include this wonderful poem by Billy Collins. I, of course, did not give it to Jay to read...it's the kind of poem that might be about turning ten but wouldn't be truly understandable until he's thirty.

When Jay was two he had an imaginary friend named Orban. Then came Hair, Glasses, Head Frensky and Fudd. All five of Jay's imaginary friends. Orban was the main guy, but he was killed in China a few years back (where in the heck did that come from?) and the other's have just faded away. I miss those guys! Here's a poem, for Jay....


On Turning Ten


The whole idea of it makes me feel
like I'm coming down with something,
something worse than any stomach ache
or the headaches I get from reading in bad light--
a kind of measles of the spirit,
a mumps of the psyche,
a disfiguring chicken pox of the soul.

You tell me it is too early to be looking back,
but that is because you have forgotten
the perfect simplicity of being one
and the beautiful complexity introduced by two.
But I can lie on my bed and remember every digit.
At four I was an Arabian wizard.
I could make myself invisible
by drinking a glass of milk a certain way.
At seven I was a soldier, at nine a prince.

But now I am mostly at the window
watching the late afternoon light.
Back then it never fell so solemnly
against the side of my tree house,
and my bicycle never leaned against the garage
as it does today,
all the dark blue speed drained out of it.

This is the beginning of sadness, I say to myself,
as I walk through the universe in my sneakers.
It is time to say good-bye to my imaginary friends,
time to turn the first big number.

It seems only yesterday I used to believe
there was nothing under my skin but light.
If you cut me I could shine.
But now when I fall upon the sidewalks of life,
I skin my knees. I bleed.

Billy Collins

Saturday, January 5, 2008

Did You Know...

that if you click on a picture in someone's blog, it enlarges the picture?!?! Well, it does. Cool.

Goodbye Christmas, Hello Philosophy


I have put Bumble away and that can only mean Christmas is over. I love all the old Christmas shows; Rudolph, Frosty the Snowman, It's a Wonderful Life, and The Grinch. OMG, and Charlie Brown. Did you LOVE that tiny Christmas tree. And did you just well up with tears when all the kids realized what Christmas was REALLY about and, most important, that the little wilty tree was beautiful. Sigh. Then, after Christmas it all goes away in a box until next year. That's a problem with video and DVD. When I was a kid, those shows came on once a year and we all knew which night and what time at least a few days in advance. My mom would make fudge and put my hair in pink foam curlers and my dad and mom and I would sit on the (weird) green shag carpet and watch. So, to combat the instant gratification disease, I put all the movies in a box and they only come out at the holidays. I make fudge or peppernuts but I do not put my son's hair in curlers.

Speaking of Jay, Here's a bit of a story. I have these cork squares on my office wall by the computer. He was intrigued by the one that says, Laugh too loud. When people look at you, laugh louder (given to me by Maggie years ago). He asked me, What does that mean exactly? He's already mortified if I just giggle in public. He has forbidden me from car dancing and he's not too happy with my singing either. When I got that slush spilled down into my car window a few weeks ago, he just sat in the back seat saying, Can we just go. It will be fine. Do you have to talk to the manager? I try and explain to him how NECESSARY it is in life to speak out, to be yourself, to laugh too loud sometimes but he just thinks I'm a weirdo. I love that the thing that's taken me years to accomplish...the thing I'm proud of, just being myself, is the very thing that mortifies and embarrasses my dear son. When I told him what I think that card means; that it's okay to be silly in public/have fun/be who you are, he just said, That doesn't make any sense to me.

I have four of those cork squares up, here's another. I hope you can read the Bukowski poem, it rocks. The tiny button in the middle I've had for years and never seen another like it. I love it. It says, in itty bitty letters, It's so fuckin great to be alive. You know how some people's brains don't make enough serotonin? Sometimes I think mine produces too much. :P


I just took this picture out my office window. It's snowing like crazy here. There is this one very specific feeling that I love. It's being inside...inside anywhere...a car, a house, the library, all warm and dry. And outside it's snowing or raining and cold. Yum. I love that feeling. Now, on the flip side, I cannot stand to ice skate or go sledding. It's too freakin cold! I'd rather be in the lodge, by the roaring fire, reading a book with a glass of red then swooshing down the slopes outside. And occasionally laughing too loud.